The Wasted Years

“Honestly, I can’t recall ever doing that to you,” she said.

Her voice was soft, and sincere; her eyes wide with curiosity. She wasn’t defensive, just confused. And in that moment, I could tell... she was telling the truth.

But me? I sat there, brows furrowed, trying so hard to keep the anger from leaking out through my eyes. My mind was screaming, “what do you mean you can’t remember? How can you forget the words that bruised my heart so deeply? How dare you act like it didn’t happen? After all these years of carrying this pain… this is what I get?”

For years, I had rehearsed this moment in my head, the day I’d finally tell Mimi how much her words and actions hurt me. The day I’d speak my truth and finally find healing.

And now that day had come.

I had the privilege of sitting face to face with her. My heart was pounding with a mix of relief and fear. But the moment I brought up the past, Mimi looked at me with a puzzled face and gently said she couldn’t remember any of it.

That was the heartbreak I wasn’t prepared for.

I didn’t know how to feel. For a moment, it felt like I had wasted years. All the sleepless nights, bottled-up emotions, and silent tears — it suddenly felt useless. I was expecting acknowledgment, remorse, maybe even a hug. But she couldn’t even remember.

Then she apologized, a simple, quiet apology.

And just like that… she was free.

But me? I felt like a fool.

How do you explain pain to someone who doesn’t even remember causing it? How do you forgive someone who didn’t think they did anything wrong? I wanted to scream. But instead, I found myself whispering, “It’s fine.” But it wasn’t fine.

I sat still, numb and shocked. That’s when I heard Him — the still small voice that’s always clear in my heart:

“Elizabeth, that’s what unforgiveness does. It steals your present joy and traps you in unnecessary pain.”

“But forgiveness; forgiveness sets you free. It makes your joy complete.”

Tears welled up in my eyes, not because of Mimi anymore, but because of the truth in those words.

That day, I made a decision; not because I wasn’t hurt, but because I valued peace over pain. I chose forgiveness. I let go. Not for Mimi, but for me.

Forgiveness is one thing I’ve wrestled with in my walk with God. I used to think it was unfair to forgive people who didn’t understand the depth of the damage they caused. But now I know, forgiveness isn’t about fairness. It’s about freedom.

Beloved, you will be offended in this life. That’s not in your control. But how you respond is.

You can hold on to the pain and let it rob you of joy, or you can choose forgiveness, not because it didn’t hurt, but because your peace matters more.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you’re weak. It doesn’t mean you weren’t wronged. It means you’re wise enough to choose healing over resentment.

Let go. Choose peace. Choose progress.

Because while they may have forgotten, you deserve to be free.